One of the most prominent things that echoes in my mind from reading What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage is in the introduction where the author, Amy Sutherland, talks about her change:

I'm an altogether different person than I was three years ago. My friends and family may not have noticed but I am almost unrecognizable to myself at times. My outlook is more optimistic. I'm less judgmental. I have vastly more patience and self-control. I'm a better observer. I get along better with people, especially my husband. I have a peace of mind that comes from the world making so much more sense to me.

First, I have to point out that it's paragraphs like these that are the primary carrot-on-the-stick with regards to self-help books. On the other hand, I believe her. I believe that unlike other skills (like learning how to program or practice medicine), getting better at social skills will directly make you happier.

There's so many different explanations for how we're social animals. For example, there's that one article on solitary confinement that talks about the cognitive decay that ensues when you're isolated from human contact. Or there's this other paper a psychologist handed to me that explains how our identities are constructed in our social relations, and therefore we have an outer-body identity that's more prominent than any inner-body identity.