According to Myer-Briggs, 75% of the time the tests show I'm an ENFP, or Idealist-Champion. The other 25% it usually shows ENFJ, The Giver.

ENFP = Extraverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving.

Perhaps my systemic flaw is the lack of J, or "Judging," in my life.

I feel like some people spend their whole lives battling a systemic flaw, spending decades in therapy or jumping from one pop-psych self-help book to the next. Being in constant self-struggle is not the way to live. I don't want to be 85 and tell my grandkids, "Well, it's the struggle that's meaningful in life!" B.S. I want to stop struggling and start living!

Occasionally, while in the throes of a deep, introspective episode, a thought will hit me: "Phil, you've been grinding away at this problem for years!" This is a really depressive thought, to think of all the wasted time just thinking. But the hopeful and "meta" side of me asks the question, "What kind of person carries this kind of problem their whole life? How do I not be that person?" I start to think of what could be my systemic flaws.

I feel like everybody I talk to at least has heard of things like ENFP, INFJ, etc. Many people know their own label. You would think someone so against B.S. in psych wouldn't mention these personality tests. But the trick is to not take them too seriously, and to take many of them, so that you can paint an impression of your psychological profile. I believe in psychological profiles. I believe that if you have a P at the end of your profile, you have more in common with other "Perceivers" than those with a J at the end. Stereotypes may be false, but traits do come in groups.

So in my case, I'm more of a P than a J. A perceiver rather than a judger. And that matches ordinary behavior in me. After watching a movie, for example, I usually don't pass judgment afterward, but rather express my feelings. I say, "That put me to sleep" or "That really engaged me." Rather than, "Well, that was stupid" or "What a wonderful film."

But I wonder if the lack of J could be a systemic flaw, because here's the way I drive through life: I just keep going, keep going, keep going until I start to get depressed, and then introspect about why I'm depressed, eventually figure out what's bothering me, and then change course. So I'm constantly veering off until the red flags come up, and then I re-balance. The problem with this pattern is that there's no prediction and prevention. And I spend a lot of my life in the mud, introspecting and re-orienting. It would be nicer to sail steady. That's where judgment comes in handy. When you're just focused on perception, you'll only make decisions based on what's affecting your senses right now. Judging goes one degree behind perception and says, "this is not good" which in a way says, "if I were to engage this, I'd probably not be pleased." Being a Perceiver is more about trial-and-error and auto-correction until you find a routine that satisfies you for a while. And then you veer off again.

But how do you get better at judging? How can you change your psychological profile? Do you just get practice making judgments on things? Do you tell yourself every 5 minutes, "okay, judge!"